Problem

When there exists a problem between two people, it is not only necessary but critical that those two individuals identify and acknowledge the problem. I feel that the stages in identifying a problem between two is the same as the stages of grief, more or less.

Stage 1: Denial
Both parties will usually tend to deny that the problem actually exists. They run, they hide.

Stage 2: Anger
Both parties will feel angry at the situation and will try to blame it on the other. This part also exacerbates the problem and puts them in an even bigger rut.

Stage 3: Bargaining
The basic "you do this for me" dialogues are said which sometimes hurt the other party. Life and relationships are not about bargaining. They never are. But yes, they are about compromise and understanding.

Stage 4: Depression
Both parties get lost in the abyss of sadness and uniscence. This depressed state of affairs leaves too many wounds to heal.

Stage 5: Acceptance
After days, or months, or years of self-argument, you realize that there is a bloody problem. What you should have realized a while ago, dawns upon you now. The question remains, is it too late?

The two people can tackle a problem together or run from it. They could bring in a third person for some more insights and perspectives or they could bring in the eight hundredth and fourth person for his advice. Nothing will be solved unless both of them admit and accept. Unless they understand each other and their point of views. Unless they realize what wrong has been done. Unless they make an effort.

The two people I am talking about are just two people. They are not your boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, wives, mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, grandparents, sons, daughters. They are just two human beings between whom a problem exists. Now, how they choose to approach it is up to themselves.